If The Pessimist Only Realized!
To SUBSCRIBE, click HERE
.
BY CAROL QUINN
I’m convinced there are a lot of people who don’t really understand what “being negative” means when is comes to a person’s attitude. I once knew someone who touted he didn’t have a negative bone in his body. Interestingly, he was one of the most negative people I knew.
Negativity, or being negative, is placing one’s focus on the bad things that happen or could happen. At a social event, there was a person who monopolized a conversation by sharing events from his week. It involved a minor medical procedure he was facing. Over and over, he reiterated in detail the barriers he encountered, the uncooperative people, and all things that didn’t go his way while trying without success to book a doctor’s appointment. Anyone listening could have found it easy to get caught up in his story. After about 20 minutes, I even started to feel my stress level rising. There was no doubt this guy was frustrated. You could hear it in his voice and see it in his face. His was reliving it as he spoke. What I found perplexing, however, was after making the initial phone calls and then running into the insurance-related roadblocks, he didn’t seem to put forth much effort to overcome those obstacles. As if his hands became suddenly tied, he stopped trying. It was almost like he would rather complain or be an unhappy passenger in life than do what it takes to change it. Interestingly, this was the same person who declared himself to be absent of all negativity.
Time and time again, the most negative people I encounter usually don’t consider themselves to be negative. They simply think of themselves as being realists or just stating the facts. I have learned, when a person starts out a sentence saying “I’m not being negative, BUT…” what is about to follow is going to be all about the problem with no interest in finding a solution. It’s odd because it’s almost like they’re not quite ready for a better experience. Certainly that couldn’t be true.
It’s not surprising that negativity and an “I can’t” attitude go hand-in-hand. They are like birds and feathers. Oppositely, optimism and seeking a solution go hand-in-hand as well. Maybe that’s why research has found that all High Performers have the “I can” attitude in common.
“I can’t” and the why not explanation that follows is not realism but rather its defeatism. It doesn’t matter how it’s packaged to the contrary. People who think they can’t do something often times never spend the required time creatively searching for a way. They lack the courage to try and then they blame it on an insurmountable roadblock and talk about the hopelessness of their situation. They’ve already fast forwarded and jumped to a negative, ‘it’s not possible’ conclusion…but deem it realistic. As a result, they skip the most important step in the process of achievement. They fail to look for a solution - and it’s because they’ve already given up. If only we could stand back and watch this happening in slow motion. This is the most crucial point in the process of achievement and it often happens in a split-second. What really determines success and failure are not the many things that get in our way, the people who won’t cooperate, or all the so-called “insurmountable obstacles” but rather, it’s making up our own mind to relentlessly pursue a solution and not give up before one is found. Without this way of thinking, many goals are never achieved! For those who shoot down suggestions and are quick to dismiss ideas as not being viable, their mind is already made up. They’re happy to defend their position, after all, they’ re just being realistic. But are they really?
“I can’t” thinkers think this way because they are the ones who don’t understand what truly could be accomplished if they put their mind to it. It’s unrealized potential that remains unrealized for as long as this negative mindset persists. The change in results that many people seek happens as a result of a change from within. The saddest part is how many simply won’t make this change and will live their entire lives denying their own power to improve their results and achieve their goals. I’ve noticed that negative people don’t talk about having good experiences much. It goes without saying that we all have bad experiences from time-to-time. The question that must be asked is, are people truly negative because of their bad experiences or because they are negative they get stuck in and are unable to move from them?
…
…TO BE CONTINUED. If you would like to receive the conclusion to this article, titled (Part II) - What High Achievers Do Next…, click HERE to subscribe (it’s free) and enter to words “High Achiever” in the comment box and we’ll be happy to e-mail it to you.
Why not share this article or newsletter with everyone you know?
